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User blog:Mlp philomena/P.S.A. Breaking the System
We interrupt this Roleplay to give you a public service announcement from the crown. A gruff guard pony walks into view, clears his throat and begins to speak. “Sergeant Buttercup here! Today’s PSA is on breaking the fourth wall. We all know it’s there, but we don't like to admit it!” There seems to be a commotion off camera that makes the Sergeant pause for a moment. After a short time, he resumes. “It is a fragile little window that-”, The sergeant is suddenly cut off as the camera spins around. Queen Chrysalis resins the director in place. “YOU! Camera Three! … Stay on my good side”. Sargent Buttercup attempts to run. “And where do you think /you/ are going?” She surrounds the shaking guard with magic and forces him to stand next to her. The camera refocuses on the pair. “Is this what you're trying to teach in your PSA?” She takes the giant cue cards and begins flipping through them. “Role Play and You? How to Talk to Mares? Popular Ice cream Topics?” She chucks the cue cards away with her magic. “What kind of show is this? Who watches this and wants to know this garbage?” --- Meanwhile, in the Day Palace, Celestia sits, watching her television. She holds the receiver of a red phone up to one of her delicate ears. “Yes. I see it. I was just about to call.” On the video screen, Chrysalis speaks. “Look. I’m taking over this show and before it’s over, anyone that is watching is going to learn something. I'm going to teach you all how you can beat the system!” Celestia pauses. “Let her speak for a moment. I need to know what loophole she found so I may patch it.” --- Back in the studio, Chrysalis continues. “ First off, let’s talk about this thing here,” She holds in her hoof a small, blue bird. “This is known as a tweet bird. There are millions of these little pests flying around our world, forming what is known as the twitter network.” The bird escapes her hoof, and she reels it back in with an aura of magic. “Every one of you ponies have one, but what I'm going to share with you today is how to manipulate the system,” she pokes the screen. “IN /YOUR/ FAVOR.” She walks around the set, looking around at the props. “What is this place? Oh, right. Public Access PSA’s. Why could I not like, take over a better network to start with?” A drone yells out from somewhere along the side of the set. “Aim Low!” The queen’s horn lights up. The sound of a sand bag falling can be heard. It lands next to the drone, spooking him, and he shuts up. “As I was saying.. about once a month, we see a little something like this go down.” The camera pans over and focuses on @mlp_Myriad, who seems bored. An aura of not wanting to be present emanates from her. She lifts up a piece of paper, and in a monotone voice begins to read. “Hey, Everypony. For some reason, I have lost the password to my account… If everypony could please follow my new account,” She air quotes with her hooves. “at M L P underscore,” She sighs. “Less than sign, the number three, Myriad, less than sign, then the number three again..” Myriad stops talking and looks towards Chrysalis just as the camera moves back over to show the Changeling Queen on the screen again. “Oh no… Myriad lost her password! Clearly, her player can't handle the responsibility of remembering her own personal information. She must have also lied about her email, otherwise, she could just recover it.” She laughs and then ducks as a notebook is thrown at her from somewhere offscreen. “Yeah, well…This is how you, yourself, can beat the system.” She slides over a very large chalkboard. “Look out! I'm going all Glen Buck on you guys. It’s because I’m evil.” “First off, GOOGLE IS YOUR FRIEND! I'm not only saying this in order to get a free Google Glass. It’s actually true! Seriously, it’s a free service. It gives you email and documents that you may access from any computer and/or smartphone, regardless of the operating system. Now let’s see. I need an email to use as an example.” She grins for a moment before taking the chalk and writing, “Moonbuttprincess@gmail.com”. -- Somewhere, Luna just folds her hooves, not amused. -- “Okay. Let’s see. So you registered your email moonbuttprincess@gmail.com and created a twitter account. I am about to blow your mind. Let’s say you have…”, She shrugs. “Three accounts. They are Luna, Soren and Angel. But wait! What is this? You have a separate email for each account?" “NO! BAD PONY! THAT’S A BAD PONY!”, she erases the board. “This first tip is how you can have as many twitter accounts under a SINGLE email.” The backstage ponies collectively gasp. “Yeah, I know. You just need to be smarter than this little bluebird here. Allow me to explain. THIS is your secret weapon.” She holds up a card that has a plus sign drawn upon it. A small fanfare, similar to what one might hear when acquiring a new object in The Legend of Zelda games, plays from somewhere off screen. “This widdle thing is going to make your life so much easier. Gmail has an internet protocol built into your email which is ‘Address@Domain.region’, and all we are going to do is modify it so that it looks more like ‘Address+protocol@domain.region’. To make thing even easier, let’s just give the protocol the name of the character you're playing. Thats right, ‘moonbuttprincess+luna@gmail.com’ is, in all ways, your email with a built in protocol.” She looks around, then whispers to the camera. “The email with this protocol is now considered unique to Twitter and you can make a new account with it,” She suddenly SQUEES. “All of your accounts can be created under a single email!” “So, if applying this information, this is what you should be doing.” “But wait! We are not done. Some of you use emails properly, and you probably don't want all of your accounts’ emails dumping into a single inbox. Filters can help you with this. This is SO easy. Look! I made you pictures!” Em-04.png|how to set up your account part 1 Em-05.png|how to set up your account part 2 Em-06.png|how to set up your account part 3 Em-07.png|how to set up your account part 4 Em-08.png|how to set up your account part 5 “But WAIT, there’s even more! Let’s talk about passwords now. Everyone can learn a thing or two, so let’s look at what we have right now.” “My my my….How are you going to remember this? What is going to happen when you make more than one character?” “Let me offer a simple solution…” Chrysalis suddenly grabs the camera, her face taking up the entire screen. “DO NOT USE MY EXAMPLES. THEY ARE MADE UP, AND ARE NOT TIED TO AN ACTUAL ACCOUNT. THIS IS ONLY AN EXAMPLE, AND YOU SHOULD NEVER GIVE YOUR PASSWORD/S TO ANYONE.” She releases the camera and smiles, “Now, with that out of the way, let’s look at a few examples. This method is what I like to call the Three Point Pass. This password style is super easy to remember and it will work for all of your characters. As you can see, you get to pick the questions and the order of your choosing. It makes for a HUGE and complex password that’s not easy to crack, but at the same time IT IS REALLY EASY TO REMEMBER, which is the important thing. And before you ask… my player’s name is NOT Tony. Now, let’s say you forget your characters’ passwords. If you set up Gmail correctly, you can use the “I lost my password” feature to easily get it back. See, that wasn’t so hard, was it?” She eyes Sergeant Buttercup as he quickly hides a notepad. “For the final part of the show, I'm going to teach you how to overthrow the Princesses. All of that power, and all they do is-” The transmission is suddenly cut. --- Celestia holds the red telephone receiver out and lets it drop like a mic. After a moment, she gently retrieves it and hangs it up with a quiet nod. fade to black. ~Fin~ Category:Blog posts